The Pickup Liner in the Airliner
Friday, May 22, 2009 at 06:59PM | By
Bojacob I thought the title was clever too. Don't worry, it only lasts 3 minutes, then it's lame.
Anyway, perhaps there's something to us men when it comes to machoness (if that's a word.) We'd go to any length, especially when facing a woman.
Boy: Hello
Girl: Hi
I was on a plane going home from Bahrain. My wife (Blurry) has that incredible ability where she can sleep anywhere, including 90 degree airplane seats. I lost her before the plane even took off, so I was alone quite early. Dazed and sleep-deprived, I laid my head on the sorry excuse of an economy seat and closed my eyes in hopes of sleep. However, the boy behind me seemed to be quite focused the girl next to him. Sleep was difficult.
Boy: Are you Bahraini?
Girl: Yes.
Boy: I'm glad to meet you! I'm from Kuwait! I was on my way from Dubai but I took this transit route. I wanted to check Bahrain out.
Girl: Did you like it? Everyone seems to like Bahrain.
Boy: Well, I didn't leave the airport.
Girl: oh.
I grinned. This guy's a natural.
Girl: Well why not? You should have done some sightseeing.
Boy: I don't know, my friend booked this ticket for me and I'm not sure. I study in Dubai. I love Dubai! I don't like Kuwait however. Funny huh? A guy who doesn't like his own country!
Girl: *giggle*
Boy: Everyone tells me "how can you not like your own country?" I said I'm different from all of you. And it's true, I am. I'm different.
Girl: How?
Boy: I'm not like my cousins and brothers. They are all engineers and doctors, but I wanted to be something else.
Girl: What's better than an engineer or a doctor?
Boy: I want to be a lawyer. I love this field. I'm studying very hard for it.
Girl: ooo..
Boy: I was threatened to be kicked out of the university about three times now. I started with a GPA of 1.20. They gave me a warning and I studied the hardest I could after that! One semester later my GPA jumped to 1.81! The next semester it jumped to 2.1!
Girl: Er, wow..
The girl seemed to be ok, despite my bullshit sensor going through the roof. I was starting to lose interest, so my thoughts began to drift as I started daydreaming. Pink unicorns and flying coconuts appeared in my vision until...
Boy: NO!
Girl: ...what?
Boy: I'll never join the army. I won't be a slave! I don't answer to ANYONE. I'll never salute ANYONE! It's just something I can't do. That's just who I am.
I really couldn't stop smiling. I mean, perhaps I'm guilty of showing a little manliness to impress my lady, but I don't think I was that ridiculous. I rolled my eyes, and from what it looks like, so did she.
Girl: Um, I have a family member in the army. I don't think it's a problem saluting superiors. They rise up in rank over time.
Boy: I like computers.
Girl: Huh?
Boy: Yes. I'm really good at them. Some people have talent for these sorts of things. I have it.
Girl: Oh, ok. Wow, mashalla.
Boy: el7emdella. I know Microsoft-
Me: BAHAH .. ahem.
Boy: Windows, Word, Excel. All that, oh and PowerPoint!
Girl: eee mashalla.
Boy: I know! I was with Windows since 95!
Girl: wowwww
Boy: Yes, do you know what they called Windows back then?
Girl: What?
Boy: Windows 95!
I managed to draw similarities between this guy and Windows 95: they're both retarded, and they're both the same age. I truly did not know if the girl was sarcastic or fascinated, but she really deserved a medal for sitting through his drivel.
This went on for 45 minutes straight. I couldn't let Blurry miss this, as it was slowly becoming the highlight of the day.
Boy: Exams are coming. I'm ready.
Girl: *groan*
How is this guy still capable of talking?!
Captain: We will be landing in Kuwait in a couple of minutes.
Me, Blurry, Girl: Oh thank goodness!
Boy: So is there a number I can get? Phone number? Maybe MSN? E-mail? What do you think? Phone number? Anything? Hello?
Girl: ......
Boy: Ok how about you take my number. And my e-mail. Sounds good?
Girl: Ok.
Boy: Ok.
Ah, some measure of victory at least!
And so the plane landed. Not a single word was uttered between them as a cloud of "awkward" hovered above. Was the guy actually successful? I don't really know. Would she call? I have no idea. Were the seeds of love planted? ehhh who cares...
Were we entertained? Oh yeah :p
They parted ways as soon as they left the plane, and as of now, their fate is unknown. I'm making fun of him, but he could be sitting on a pink cloud of love right now! Could it be that his non-stop tongue spasms might have triggered a reason for the girl to call?! Who can understand how the brain works! Maybe I should have taken notes..... wait ... he could go:
Boy: Hey girl, what’s up? Guess what? It’s your lucky day. Out of all the girls here, I picked you to talk to!
or!
Boy: Can I have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine.
Ok, I think it's a lot more fun to make jokes :p
PS: I miss you all.

