Bojacob's Den

[Inside a dark cavern, echoes of eerie voices]

2008:  Hey hey, look, I have a joke

Me:  2008, I'm really sick of you and your jokes.

2008:  Listen, listen!  What's the difference between 2007 and 2008?

2007:  Huh?

Me:  I don't know, what's the difference between 2007 and 2008?

2008:  A YEAR!  AHAHAHA lololoilolo

Me:  I hate you so much...

2007:  That was actually funny lol.

Me:  peas in a pod, so it follows that I hate you too.

2009:  Listen, you can't really blame 2008 for anything.

Me:  And why not?  He brought little good.  I mean, look at him.

2008:  Hey hey, what's the difference between 2007 and 2009?!

Me:  Let me guess, two years?

2008:  Nothing, they're both ODD!  AHHAHAHAHAAH lololol

2007: AHAHAHAHAHA *slaps 2008 in the back*

Me:  Someone shut them the [bleep] up or I will enter the Guinness Book of World Records for being first person to murder a year.

2009:  You can't murder a year Bojacob.

2008:  OHOHO ZING!  ZING! HAHAH

Me:  Oh great, I'm glad you joined the circus too with these other clowns.

2009:  Listen, let's walk.

Me:  *sigh* fine.

2008:  Hey, where are you guys going?  Don't leave me here!

Me:  What?  Aren't you done causing pain?

2008:  I'm not done yet!  I still have time!  Don't go!  I'll stop joking!

2007:  Come on 2008, let's go.

2009:  You can't murder a year Bojacob, you either put it behind you, or shackle it to your leg and have it slow you down.

Me:  It's not really easy to forget things, 2009.

2009:  What's stopping you from letting go?  Look forward, not backwards.  Things happen, and the best time to forget about it is now.

2008:  What are you talking about?!  Look man, I'm sorry about whatever happened but-

Me:  You're history 2008.  Good bye.

2008:  Wait!  Hah, you really think you can just forget me at will?  You can't forget me! 

[covers ears and walks away]

2008:  The pain is your fault!  They were YOUR choices!  YOURS!  You only have YOURSELF to blame!  YOU HEAR ME?!

Me:  Shut up, just shut up!

2008:  YOU did this to yourself!  YOU!  *loud laughter*

[Maniacal laughter fades away as I and 2009 run far off into the distance]

[stopping and breathing hard]

Me:  Damn it...

2009:  Not very easy, is it.

Me:  No.  It's not.  Time will fix this, though, yeah?

2009:  That's the spirit.

[walking quietly in a vast empty space with a clear blue sky]

Me:  A clear mind, free of worry and pain.

2009:  And why not?  Whatever happened is in the past.

Me:  Yeah...

[walking in silence]

Me:  Hey 2009?

2009:  Hmm?

Me:  Will there be anything life-changing this year?

2009:  What do you mean?

Me:  Well, I mean, you know... road forks ..stuff, come on, you know what I mean.

2009:  Do you want your life to change?

Me:  Kind of, I guess.

2009:  Nothing will happen unless you set the wheels in motion.  Simply start it up, and a string of events will follow.

Me:  Wise and deep, yet very unhelpful.

2009:  You just defined the word "wisdom."

Me:  I mean, people turned the wrong wheels once and it resulted in quite some angst.

2009:  It's pretty complex, but you simply have to turn the correct wheels.  The ones that actually make some logical sense.  Don't let emotions do that for you.

Me:  Give me a clear yes/no answer. 

2009:  It's for you to decide, Bojacob, not me.

Me:  Figures...

2009:  I'm sorry.

[Walking quietly again]

2009:  Do you hate me yet?

Me:  Just a little, but we've only just started yeah?

2009:  Do you want to hear a joke?

Me:  Oh God...

2009:  Really, you might like it.

Me:  Fine, hit me.

2009:  How did 2004 jump the fence?

Me:  You're kidding me...

2009:  Indulge me.

Me:  Fine, how did 2004 jump the fence?

2009:  It was a leap year.

Me:  .....

2009:  And why did 2004 jump the fence?

Me:  ....?

2009:  Afraid the leap years might take a-fence!

Me:  .....mhmfff...um ..ahem

2009:  You smiled :)

Me:  I did not!

2009:  You're still smiling.

Me:  I'm not!  Your vision is curved or something.

2009:  Years have no eye-

Me:  2009, I'll kill you.

2009:  Ok, ok.  :)

[long silence]

Me:  Ok, so I smiled

2009:  I know.

Me:  Well, don't make a big deal out of it.

2009:  Starting the year with a smile.  That counts for something, Bojacob.

Me:  You know, I think this will be a good year :)

2009:  Only if you make it so.

Me:  I will.  I promise that I will.

2009:  Then let us begin!  Where do we start?

Me:  We find your so called "wheel of fate."  Hmm...

[Eyes his bass guitar]

2009:  Uh, I wouldn't exactly call that a "wheel of fate"

Me:  It's a wheel of stfu.  Now, let's hit it!

[Boom-boom-de-boom!]

Goodbye 2008.

Hello 2009!

We make our own frikkin fate here!  No reason for the past to mess with OUR minds!

Happy new year everyone :)  Chins up, and make this one your best!